A few years ago, as I prepared to move to Honduras, I was repeatedly asked if I was scared to be in such a dangerous place. Wasn’t I scared? Didn’t I know that people died there?

Yes, I knew that. I also knew that people die in Texas, too. Yeah, Honduras is so dangerous that the Peace Corps doesn’t send volunteers there anymore, and I am not minimizing the danger, but I am not any less safe there than I am in Keller, TX. More than anything, I knew that God has plans for me and He is good and He holds me in His hands, and He knows my days. And, if something happens, yeah, that’s awful, but God isn’t surprised. And He’s still gracious, loving, and kind.

This morning, I was reminded again about how safety is this illusion we have. Children went to one of the safest places for them, their classrooms, and were met there by a person who did unspeakable damage and harm to children, families, and the community. In a small town. In an elementary school. In Connecticut. In the United States of America.

Now, I am not saying that we are all doomed and we are all in danger and we may all get shot when we go to work tomorrow or go shopping, but we might. I might have a car accident on the way home. You might get robbed. He might get cancer. She might be assaulted.

It could happen. We live in a sinful, fallen, dark world. But there’s hope. There’s Jesus. He came, He saw, He conquered. He has your days numbered, He has your plans made, He watches over you. So, we do not live in fear, those of us who know and love the Lord, because we know that He is light in this dark world. Harm will come. We will get hurt. We will fall, but for the believer, our circumstance does not define our safety. Our safety and security is in Christ alone. 

We are not safe because we live in the US. We are not safe because we own a gun or don’t let our kids watch rated R movies or home school them or whatever you may do to keep everyone “safe”. We are secure because of Jesus, and Him alone. Safety is an illusion in this world. But Christ is not. Hold to that as you hug your babies tighter tonight, cling to that truth as you kiss your spouse goodbye. He is good and He holds us, and that is why, as believers, we are safe and secure. In Him we rest. Because of Him, we can have have peaceful slumber.

Well, I did it. I finished the marathon in 4:12:47. It was a really humid, wet, and hilly run, but I felt good. My friend Heather and I started off together, and split up around mile 12. I think we hadn’t taken into account the stride difference in someone who is 5 foot (Heather) and 5’9″ (me), and I was so proud of her because even though it was a hard run for her, she finished! Way to go!

Run Highs:

1.Seeing Mallery, Josh, and Anne Lincoln cheering me on.

2.Running into Jamie Hipp who told me he saw my face on a sign.

3.Having my face on a sign that my friend Carissa made for my co-workers and I who ran.

4.High-fiving the kids on the sidelines, reading the funny signs, and being cheered for. 

Run Lows:

1. Miles 21-26 where people kept saying “you’re almost there, only two more miles.” Then five minutes later someone else would say “Almost there, only four more miles”. And they kept saying “This is the last hill”. All I kept thinking was “You’re all liars! Every last one of you!” 

2. It was kind of misty in the morning, so the roads in certain areas were really slick. 

3. There was a guy running and talking on his phone and it made me so sad to think that people can’t even be quiet during a run, they have to be distracted with Twitter and Facebook and talking on the phone. Just run. And think. That’s what so great about running, it’s uninterrupted think time. 

I am almost completely positive I will run the Cowtown in February, so I will take more pictures then, but enjoy these in the mean time.

I have had a stressful two weeks, and I am so looking forward to a few days off for Christmas. Here are somethings that have been going on.

1. Tomorrow there is a marathon. I am running it. 26. 2 miles, and for the first time, I am running with a partner. This happened randomly, as my running partner, Heather, was supposed to run with someone else, and she got hurt. So, a few twitter messages, phone calls, and texts later, I have a running partner. I think this could be fun!

2. There is a show on Lifetime called “My Life is a Lifetime Movie…” Do they take applications, because I think I qualify.

3. My phone decided to stop charging so I had to get a new one this week. It does not have a real keyboard like my other one, and I am not sure how I feel about this. 

4. I have had a week full of “stress dreams”. My car tires blew out in one and I couldn’t get a mechanic to fix it in time for work, and I couldn’t get a signal to call my boss and I knew a client was coming and I woke up sweaty. In another one, I kept getting sent to different corrals for the marathon, but these corrals were movie theaters, and then once it was the last one, I found my running partner, only to remember that I had forgotten to pick up our packets. Again, woke up sweaty. 

5. My nephew got glasses. This makes me so happy, because now I am not the only person in the house that has glasses. 

6. We had our work Christmas party last night. I was stressed. I was also asked completely inappropriate questions about my divorce, while being super hungry and trying to save the table for my friends, and I wanted to cry. But, in complete and total victory, I neither bitched at anyone or purged my food. Pretty amazing grace from God. 

7. UNT is terrible at paperwork. I interviewed for the counseling master’s program last Friday, only to receive a phone call about it, telling me the dean’s office hadn’t received a paper I had signed, so they couldn’t release my transcript to the counseling program. So I called the Dean’s Office, they said I wasn’t cleared, because they didn’t have the paper, but they said they had received the paper but for some reason I still wasn’t cleared and they aren’t sure why. They said maybe it’s because I haven’t had my meningitis vaccination but that it couldn’t be that because that is listed separately  So, I had to call another office who didn’t know and said they would call back. So, six phone calls, three messages, and two e-mails later, I still have no idea what is going on, but the program decided who was accepted on Thursday, so who knows. The only thing I know for sure is that UNT has screwed up a lot of people’s paperwork. So, maybe I should go somewhere else. 

8. Here’s another thing I have been pondering (for the next stage in life, maybe to undertake in the spring) , but how do people date? Like, how does that work? Where are these people? Am I going to have to internet date? Is that what people do now? I think I’ll become a nun. 

9. Depending on how tomorrow’s run goes, I may do the Cowtown Marathon in February. Stay tuned.